Jamie's new job requires him to wake up early so therefore, he goes to bed early and I have to say..I sort of like the time to myself I have almost every night. Right now, the house is cozy and quiet, the cranberry candle is spicing the air, and I am alone with my thoughts. This is rare.
I've had a depressing day. My family got a very cold email from my Dad today accusing us of manipulating our Christmas so we won't have to include Joy's daughter Crystal. Which is entirely untrue. We even emailed her and invited her to our Christmas. It was just that we at first didn't include her in our gift exchange b/c I think its rude to expect someone to buy Christmas presents for a group of people she doesn't know! Anyway, his email was very upseting and it marinated in my gut and in my heart all day. When I read it in the morning, I couldn't help but write back a feverish email. My hands were shaking. Another nail in the coffin was he spelled my mom's name wrong in the email. My Dad is the only parent I have and the only grandparent my girls' have. Sharon is pretty well insane so I don't count her as much. Its all just a heart breaking situation. I was in my pajamas and slopping around the house like a wet mop until Jamie came home. He usually isn't good at comforting me but he gave me a big hug and wasn't mad that I didn't get any housework done and he made me a hot bowl of ramen noodles. He totally lifted my spirits and I put on some makeup, got dressed, and decided to live the day. Ever since, my heart has felt lighter. I love this boy for that.
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Today we sold the excersaucer and for some reason, it tinged a little on my heart strings. Maybe it is the ultimate confirmation that we don't have babies anymore--our girls are getting bigger and outgrowing their baby toys. Squishy is practically a little kid and Marci walks around talking about giant squid and sharks all day. There is no more need for an excersaucer. My life is in a different season now. Uh oh....I feel that familiar "maybe this shouldn't be the end" feeling coming on! NO! I have to fight it! Two is enough!!
Well, 7:30 is going to come early, especially when you have a little girl that wakes you up every hour to two hours to nurse.