Yesterday, on the whole, was a good day. Scarlett was up for a total of 28 minutes before she got fussy, so I was nervous because Jamie was working a double and I've been known to completly break down when he's gone and I'm left alone with a neglected Toddler and a screaming baby. But, Tia came and picked us up at around 1 and we went Christmas shopping. First chance I've had to go shopping! Both girls were SO well behaved (except for Marci using her five-finger discount on a stuffed animal at Target and us not noticing until we were in the car.)and I got three people done AND a stocking stuffer for Marci for only $23! God bless Target, eh? Then, Marci, the baby and I went to my sister-in-law's for the night and Marci and her cousin Sean played while Sharee and I gabbed. We have fun because we can talk about Jamie's family from an outsider's view. And we compare Jamie to his brother all the time. I think part of Sharee is me if I didn't feel bad about things. Like, I told her how I opened up a secret credit card this summer and whatnot and she was like "GOOD! You should do that so you can do some things for yourself!" It was cute. I really enjoy her company.
And then, my Marci, was yet again the bully. I don't understand it! Sean used to be the bully at first. He's four. But, Marci really instigates and I think she gets some weird pleasure out of making other kids upset. She would snatch toys from Sean's hands and then grin when he started yelling about it. But, on the whole, she was great and they both had so much fun.
Well, THEN the night started to suck. Jamie came to get me at 10 and asked if he could go out. I had told him before I don't mind if he goes and has A DRINK, since I did last week. But, listen...when I went to have a drink with Jasmine, it was at 4:30, not 11pm. And I was only gone for an hour and a half. Nightime is crazy screaming time for Scarlett, so I told Jamie "You can go if both girls go to sleep". Well, even before this, Jamie had a weird attitude towards me and it was really upsetting me. He was just really cold, so it didn't exactly make me thrilled to let him go out drinking. Marci fell asleep on the way home, but Scarlett screamed the whole time. So, Jamie kept asking me "can I go? Can I go?" And Scarlett wasn't asleep yet so I told him to wait--which made him even more pissy. So then I said "Well, you obviously don't want to be with me tonight anyway so.." and he said "I don't care what you have to say so save it." Which made me BALL my eyes out. It was just such a cold, cutting thing to say! So then he said "I don't really think this is fair. You got to go out." And I told him "Live my life for ONE day and tell me this isn't fair." Because seriously...what I do is a lot harder then what he does. I know, because I did what he does. I did the school/work/parenting thing. For two years I did that! Dealing with a toddler and a colicky baby alone for HOURS is a lot harder then that. Yeah, you're at work, but its still a social scene. Especially in the restaurant business. So anyway, he decided that he didn't care WHAT I said, he was going to go anyway. So then, of course, I was REALLY pissed and hid his car keys (we do things so maturely here), but I think he could tell that wouldn't be a good idea because he ended up not going, even when I came to my senses and realized Scarlett was in good spirits and he could go out.
I just don't get this weird feeling I get when he wants to go out. Its really not fair to him. He never gives ME shit when I want to go out. Its almost a feeling of "You'd rather be with these people then me" thing going on. But, I know thats not the case. Oh well. Its something I have to get over. Especially since I want to go to the gay bar soon.
Ok well my sister is on her way for shopping adventures.